"WOD" - Chapter Three

Chapter Three

            “Craig? Craig? Honey, please wake up.”

            The voice was so soothing and gentle that Craig suspected it to be his mother. Had he overslept again and was late for school?

            Wait. No. He can’t remember ever going to bed, the night before.

            “Craig? Craig? Please be okay. I’m so sorry, sweetheart.”

            The voice got a little clearer at the same time Craig’s senses did, and he realized that it wasn’t his mother. Slowly, he opened his eyes – the world around him a total blur. At the center of it all was a familiar shape in brown, peach, black, and olive green.

            Rania.

            Her beautiful face hovered over Craig. As it got clearer, he could see that she had been crying, tears drenched on her cheeks. She was worried and very scared. But seeing Craig reawaken, a wave of relief swept over her. “Oh, thank goodness!” she sighed. “Are you alright, sweetie?”

            Craig looked around him. He was on the floor of the console room, the state of which was in disarray. “What happened?”

            “It was all my fault,” Rania said, cleaning her face with the sleeves of her turtleneck. “I got carried away with the takeoff and the music and the singing…I’m just glad that I didn’t get you killed.” She gingerly helped him sit upright, offering him a glass of water that she had waiting just for him.

            Craig gulped the water down; it was just what he needed.

            “Thanks,” he told Rania. “Do you know where we are?”

            Rania looked to the door to her TARDIS – it was still shut. “I was so concerned about you that I didn’t even bother to check.” After making completely sure that Craig was one hundred percent A-OK, she left his side to go to the control console, looking over the readouts on the monitor. “Wherever we are, the atmosphere outside is breathable – pretty much Earth quality.”

            “And…that’s good…right?” Craig hesitated to ask.

            “Better than good, it’s awesome!” Rania beamed. “I can go out and have a look around, if you’re still feelin’ woozy.”

            “Nah, I’m good.” Craig set aside the emptied water glass and stood up.

            Together, the two traveling friends exited the alien ship and ventured into the new setting – an ominous, desolate black forest with a freezing winter climate. Snow was everywhere. While Rania’s Time Lord biology kept her unaffected by it all, Craig was so chilled that his teeth were chattering. “Y-Y-You’re r-r-r-right, R-R-Rania! I-I-It is a-a-a-awesome…a-a-awesomely cold!”

            Seeing him that way, Rania pitied him. “Oh, you poor lil’ fella! Get back inside and put on some warm clothes!”

            Craig gladly did as he was told, zipping back inside the TARDIS in a blink.

            Rania tried not to laugh out loud as she watched him go. He looked so cute waddling back through the TARDIS door like a popsicle walking on two sticks. He had been through so much in the last hour – nearly blinked out of existence in Eventide, knocked unconscious during takeoff in the TARDIS, and now freezing to death in this new world, which looked awfully familiar to the Tinkerer.

            Looking beyond the dead black trees, she spotted a tall castle that was as dark and foreboding as the forest itself. Its architecture looked to have dated as far back as the Baroque period. Late Baroque period, perhaps, Rania thought. By that information, she estimated the specific time and place of this realm.

            “We’re in France,” she muttered in amusement.

            She thought back on all the Disney classics set in France with dark castles and a dark forest that surrounded it.

            There was only one that came to mind: Beauty and the Beast.

            Rania smiled, reminiscing on the memories she had of watching that movie with Kristin, who was absolutely obsessed with it. It was one of the ‘date flicks’ she would always pick for them to watch in her old Harlem apartment.

            The film’s theme song still played in Rania’s mind, prompting her to sing it aloud there in the forest…

Tale as old as time
True as it can be
Barely even friends
Then somebody bends
Unexpectedly

Just a little change
Small to say the least
Both a little scared
Neither one prepared
Beauty and the Beast

            Halfway through the song, Rania detected her solo transpiring into a duet with another singer making a surprise entrance in the forest. She swiftly turned to see a curly-haired man standing atop a short, snow-covered mound. He was adorned in colorful attire, the style of which altered every time Rania blinked whilst looking at him. From what she was able to discern between blinks, he dressed in a purple suit and matching derby with a rainbow-colored vest, shirt, and tie.

            “Greetings and salutations, young traveler,” he tipped his bowler hat to her. “That was quite the exciting crashlanding you and your little friend survived!”

            Rania saw him motioning to her TARDIS and felt a bit uncomfortable over the colorfully-dressed stranger’s awareness of it. “I’m sorry but…who are you, sir?”

            “Oh, where are my manners?” The man facetiously bonked himself on the head with his derby. “My name is Riff.”

            “Well, Mr. Riff,” Rania addressed with a frown, “you look like Weird Al.”

            Riff cackled. “I assure you, madam, any resemblance between me and the famous parody singer is purely coincidental.”

            “Uh-huh.” Rania remained skeptical.

            Noting her skepticism, Riff smirked and said, “Oh, so you want proof, eh? How ‘bout this?” Out of nowhere, an accordion materialized right into Riff’s hands, much to the surprise of Rania, and the bizarre man flew into a lively, whimsical polka song that he somehow managed to rope Rania into singing also, as well as dance to…

Riff:
Spin and twirl through time and space
In the multiverse we find our place
Every world a brand new face
Join the dance, pick up the pace

Rania:
Parallel lives, side-by-side
In each one, a different ride
Infinite paths, our hearts confide
Come along, let’s let it slide

Multiverse dance, come take a stance
Round and round with every chance
Alternate you and me in a trance
Join us in the multiverse dance

Riff:
From a sky of stars we fall
Through the curtains hear the call
Lose yourself in the cosmic hall
Dance through all worlds big and small

Rania:
In this endless web we spin
Lines of fate just wear thin
Step by step, let’s begin
Every door, let us in

Multiverse dance, come take a stance
Round and round with every chance
Alternate you and me in a trance
Join us in the multiverse dance

Parallel lives, side-by-side
In each one, a different ride
Infinite paths, our hearts confide
Come along, let’s let it slide

Multiverse dance, come take a stance
Round and round with every chance
Alternate you and me in a trance
Join us in the multiverse dance
Join us in the multiverse dance

            Rania laughed along with Riff after the close of the song. She wasn’t sure if it was a spell he placed on her or if it was all natural. Either way, she felt really good. “That was fun,” she told Riff. “But my point about you and Weird Al still stands.”

            “What?!” Riff groaned. “Does Weird Al play an accordion to polka like this?”

            “Yes…yes, he does,” Rania frowned. “I thought you knew about him.”

            “I know of him but not about him,” Riff clarified.

            Rania shook her head, giggling. Whoever or whatever this ‘Riff’ guy was, he certainly showed himself to be quite the quirky character, in such a short time. She soon heard tiny footsteps crunching through the snow and turned to see the bundled-up Craig emerge. Looking directly at Riff, he asked, “Who’s that guy?”

            “Greetings and salutations, young traveler,” Riff repeated his earlier greeting, even following with the same hat-tipping gesture as before. “My name is Riff, and your mother and I just had quite the wonderful little humdinger!”

            “Oh, no, I’m not his—” Rania started to say, before she suddenly got distracted. “Wait. Did you just say ‘humdinger’?”

            “What’s a humdinger?” Craig asked.

            “Something no one in your century has ever said,” Rania told him. She returned on Riff and queried, “What time and place do you come from, Mr. Riff? You’re not with the Ouroboros agency, are you?”

            Riff scoffed at the presumption. “Those geeks? Nah! I’m not tethered to any pencil-pushing organization. I’m a free spirit like you two.” Suddenly, he materialized from the mound to directly behind Rania and Craig. “Yep, just a traveler of multiple dimensions, except I don’t require a neat-looking ship like that one.” He pointed to Rania’s TARDIS.

            “Oh, so you’re a Warper?” Rania presumed again. “I know someone who was married to one, but she claimed to be the last of her kind.”

            “And she very well could be, ‘cause I’m no Warper either,” Riff said. “Nope. My people have no name like all you other sentient races. But, if you are into labels, we’ll can go with ‘Imago’.”

            Rania raised a curious eyebrow. “Imago? That’s what you wanna go with?”

            “Hey, it may not roll off the tongue like ‘hoo-man’ does, but I like it,” Riff declared.

            “Whatever floats your boat, dude,” Rania shrugged. “You’re more than welcome to join us, but we’re gonna be in this dimension for a while. My TARDIS needs some time to recover from the impromptu landing.”

            Riff excitedly snapped his fingers and suggested, “Why don’t I be your guide?”

            “You know all about the Disneyverse?” Craig asked.

            “Do I?” Riff eagerly said. He then paused and repeated the question hesitantly, “Do I?”

            Rania shook her head and giggled again.

            She patted Riff on the shoulder and reassured, “It’s O.K., Mr. Riff. I have a bit of knowledge to this specific world. And I tell you what we’re not gonna do – we’re not going there.” She pointed to the dark castle on the horizon.

            Spotting it, Craig asked her, “Why not?”

            “Because a vicious beast who has yet to find love lives there,” Rania said. “And I’d rather not interfere in the natural course of this reality.”

            “Well, we still have to find Joanie,” Craig recalled their mission priority. “Or else it won’t matter what happens to the reality’s ‘natural course’.”

            Rania wholeheartedly nodded. “I agree.”

            “Me, three!” Riff cheered. “And I just remembered a place where we can start – a nearby little town…it’s a quiet village.”

            “Every day like the one before?” Rania teased in return.

            Catching on, Riff smiled and replied, “A little town full of little people waking up to say…”

            “BONJOUR!” Both Rania and Riff repeatedly bellowed with a laugh.

            Craig followed and watched them in confusion as they went into a song about someone named ‘Belle,’ all while making the trek to that town Riff spoke about.

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